The One Thing We All Want to Know
The Step Stool Smile. Just. Wow.
I was thinking about which part I wanted to quote here, and I have way too many things that I think are fantastic about this whole idea of wanting to know how we're getting home.
For me, the concept of sometimes I'm the smiler and sometimes I'm the one who wants to look away speaks truth. Being the smiler or looking away comes pretty naturally. NOT looking away can be difficult or challenging, depending on the moment, the day or the experience. Going through this experience has only just begun to make me excruciatingly aware that I am not so comfortable being dependent or accepting when being offered support.
I am grateful and appreciative and will work very hard at not looking away!
That being said, right now for me, being home means that my friends and family continue with their snarky humor, that we can gossip about what the neighbors are saying or doing, that you and I figure out how to show our passion about social justice and missions, that when we scrapbook we ooh and aah over each others families and photos, that we go out for breakfast, lunch, coffee, or a drink (or even bowling with pizza and beer), that I can tell you about all the movies I (and maybe we) have seen, that maybe you still go to scary movies with me where we can laugh and scare each other for days afterwards, that we plan on going to see Anne Lamott when she comes to Birmingham, that we travel when we are able, that we share what we think about the latest Scandal TV show, that we go to plays and musicals, that we are rebels in any way that we can!
Things may change, but I don't want our relationships to (except to get better!)!
So, what's happened today?
Fair Warning! I totally get if the info I put out there gets to be too much information. You are hereby released from reading in detail about any of the particulars that I post. This is simply for my ability to chronicle what's happening for the folks who like that kind of thing (which also includes me!).
This morning, I made my 2 planned phone calls from home: one to Brookwood diagnostic center to tell them I needed a disk of the mammogram and ultrasound to take to Kirklin Clinic by this afternoon, and the other to check in with Kirklin about my scans for this afternoon.
Good thing I called...somehow I missed a call or I was supposed to call last week, but they wanted me to be at UAB by 8:00 (not mid afternoon like I thought) for the dye injections for the nuclear scans. Since it was already 8:30 by the time I called, I jumped in and out of the shower, and we flew down to UAB. Thank goodness Bill was flexible today! (I have the feeling I'll be saying that a lot!).
Bill dropped me off at Jefferson Tower, UAB Hospital. That's where I got the injection. After that, it was going to be a 3 hour wait for the dye to get through my system, so I checked in with Kirklin again, and we walked over to Kirklin for the CT scan. That was an interesting experience. While getting checked in, I had a great conversation with Crystal, the intake nurse. I was told that the scan included drinking 2 glasses of contrast liquid (tasted like water). Then Crystal said that after an initial scan, I'd have another scan after receiving an injection in an IV.
(Note to self: if you weren't sure that you liked needles or not, you DON'T!!)
She said that my reaction to the injection would be a metallic taste in the back of my mouth, then a warm flush like a hot flash (yep, I know what those are like), and then I would feel like I was urinating but I really wasn't. What? Say that again? Yep, that's how women feel. Men have reported their testicles tingly. Hmm. Wouldn't have guessed that.
All of that reaction in a minute or so, then done.
And that's pretty much how it went. All told, relatively quick. At that point, Bill and I walked to the car and flew back to Brookwood to pick up the requested disk information. That was at 12:00, and we were back at UAB for my 12:30 arrival. Bill took the disks to Dr. Nabell's office. UAB was VERY timely (THANK YOU!) about calling me back so the dye was optimal. I was taken to the not yet opened brand new nuclear medicine floor for the latest machinery, etc. Krenisha told me that she had been working on the floor for about 2 weeks, and that everyone was going to be moving to that floor in the next 3 weeks. That machine was like a donut...I laid down (both scans fully clothed in case you were wondering), and the table that I laid on moved back and forth. About 20 minutes total. We walked out of the office at about 1:30.
Krenisha said that the scans were already sent to the radiologist who would be looking at everything this afternoon and would be getting back to Dr. Nabell. She said it was probably not likely that I would hear anything today, but I will call Tuesday morning to find out when we can meet up for results. As of right now, there are no results posted on my online Patient Portal.
We were STARVING afterwards (no food only water for me and Bill sat patiently after his regularly scheduled oatmeal breakfast), so we went to Fish Market...a huge advantage to being at Kirklin since it's across the street! Nirvana! And, yes, I had a dessert of key lime pie because I was rewarding myself.
I'm drinking as much water as possible to flush all that crap out of my system. It was a lot longer day than either of us expected, but it's a relief to have this part done. Based on what Dr. Nabell said last week, I will most likely have an MRI also, to complement the mammography. Not scheduled yet.
So, with a lost work day, Bill is on his computer and I'm on mine...since we finished eating at 2:30, we won't really need dinner tonight! Soup probably, as a good comfort food after the comfort of Fish Market!
No news continues to be no news. Grateful that Dr. Nabell said not to be challenged by the uncertainty of the lymph node last week. Grateful that my husband is caring and loving and funny and knows me so well. Grateful that my family is there for me. Grateful that my friends are also there for me.
Love you! Denise
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